deep within

Well, ignore this if you don’t want to know the itsy bitsy details of what i have been up to basically from September till now…It’s just for me to remember what I have been doing and whether I’ve completely wasted my time on things which are unnecessary :P

September:

-Started playing the keyboards in church (COOS)…i remember being paranoid when it was time to once again sit in a worship practice session after soo long (6 years?…not including the time when practising for ibnot’s worship session la :P) Was asked to play but i was too apprehensive? … and once again, it brought me back to the time when ‘what’s his name?’ (remember the face tho’ :P) asked me to play for YC back in kl…and i was too scared to play as i’ve always thought that my playing was just not good enough..and hence i declined…Ironically, after a while, i decided to audition and then got into the worship team. It feels like i am in this time machine which just replays the things that I have gone through; but just in different scenarios. After all these years, i still feel that my skill has gone no where- it is just stagnant and collecting dust perhaps? I still can play but there isn’t this sense of ‘wow! i actually played that?!’ Contradictions upon contradictions, gah…when will i ever learn to venture out boldly? I’m afraid and yet I want to try. Just give me time for these wings to fly…Complacent i have been, lying in the box, waiting for a chance to break open…or wouldn’t it be better to just sit there in silence, waiting, waiting, waiting…Don’t get me wrong, I don’t strive to play well so that other people can sit there and admire at my wonderful skills. I’m just bored. Anyway, i’ve started playing already; 4 times so far.

- Bonding session with band mates. After the baptism service, we went to this playground in Tiong Bahru and it was super duper fun! Felt as though i relived my childhood :P Played around with the slides, flying fox…; had charades, chasing,mooncakes..ended with some drinks at the nearby hawker centre (aiyah, not mamak) Ohya, funniest thing is the chicken lantern which emits bubbles from its backside! *lol*

- My mid-semester break was spent studying at my room or the library from morning till night time with breaks for meals. Haha..ok, i’m exaggerating over here…breaks for email checks, baths, laundry..etc. Did, i imagine myself doing this for my supposed break? No way! But due to the 5 CAs that i was going to have at that time. It was inevitable. I like this word- inevitable :) Special thanks to mugging friends: Faith, Pui Yee, Maureen

- Was supposed to meet my cousin Han Pin who came down from KL..he brought down mooncakes from my aunt but due to the lack of time on both sides- i was super tired after my first 2 CAs and he was too busy shopping…sigh, HP, HP…u enjoyed Singapore a lot eh?

- Got news from a music company, and was about to teach a 57 year old lady basic piano but she backed out at the very last minute. Ouch! I guess, i couldn’t have handled it properly as well, due to the amount of things i had to do then! I’m more free now tho, hmm…

- Worship seminar at Faith Methodist Church (FMC) aka Uliang’s church! Sonic Edge was leading worship and it was absolutely fabulous. The session was from 9 am till 1pm, covering materials supposedly for 3 days! So, u can imagine i’m sure, how rushed the whole thing was :P Lots of insights tho’ . I felt blessed to have gone when i first thought of not going. Received a goodie bag too! Tht reminds me, i haven’t really looked at the stuff ‘cept for one book!

- Hearing some news from home which put me in this state of.. i don’t know..i rather not reveal here..but it’s nothing much really ….

October:

- Karaoke party for Poi Yan! Quite a number of people’s bdays at that time: her, Pastor Glenn Lim and Bey! haha…funny when Ps Glenn asked me on how i got to know his bday :P Birthday Alarm- the next best tool for discovering people’s birthdays. What’s the best tool? Ask God, He is all knowing when our memories, systems and files fail. He knows all. Ya, back to karaoke. My first time in a karaoke! Felt like a suakoo. But it was fun! More than I’ve expected! Was soft at the beginning but loud (ok, louder) at the end ! hahaha…Felt so liberated singing silly songs, love songs, chinese songs, malay songs..without thinking on what the others think of my singing..out of tune? out of tune lah! :D lalalalala.